Relationship “Requires Work”, but What Precisely Does It Imply?
You Should Know These Top 25 Tips to Be the Best Valentine to Your Partner
Note: I’m not a Relationship Guru! I’m writing all these from the list of things that I’ve taken into consideration to be the best partner to my future wife.
Relationships, like military missions, necessitate planning, vision, and effort. Being in a relationship isn’t always simple, but healthy couples know how to deal with the ups and downs; they know how to weather the storm.
Love is necessary for any happy romantic relationship, but it is not sufficient. Both parties must be willing to work on their relationship in order for it to be healthy. With life tugging you in numerous directions, it’s critical to stay focused and know how to nourish your relationship so it can thrive.
Strong affections for each other are obviously necessary, but with all of life’s demands, finding meaningful time with your significant other can be difficult.
Fortunately, there are a plethora of ways to provide your relationship with the care and attention it requires to thrive. Best of all, many of them don’t necessitate a significant shift in your regular routine or a significant financial investment.
We’ve all heard that a relationship “requires work,” but what precisely does it imply?
To be honest, that sounds like a chore. Who wants to work for hours only to return home to job number two? Isn’t it nicer to think of your relationship as a source of comfort, entertainment, and pleasure?
It would, of course. That said, if things feel stuck if the good times are dwindling if arguing is your primary mode of communication, or if you simply need a tune-up, here are some basic remedies. They might even be entertaining.
Maintaining a good relationship does not have to be a difficult or time-consuming effort. Really!
Allow me to elaborate, and as you read on, you might just discover that maintaining a healthy relationship isn’t as difficult as you think.
1 — Communication skills are mandatory
Effective communication is the foundation of strong relationships. When it comes to determining which couples will stay happy, communication style is more essential than commitment levels, personality attributes, or stress. To keep the environment honest and open, make an effort to truly listen to each other and communicate both positive and negative feelings. Some people utilize a phone conversation during the day to settle family matters, allowing them to spend more time together at home.
Moreover, healthy couples don’t avoid disagreement, but they do know how to communicate effectively. Couples who are happy know that the best talks take place without the use of phones, tablets, or laptops.
2 — Respect is a must
Respect entails accepting someone for who they are, even if they differ from you or with whom you disagree. In your interactions, respect fosters feelings of trust, security, and well-being. “Thank you” and “please” should not be reserved for the workplace. Manners are vital, even when dealing with someone you’ve known for 20 years. Treat your spouse with the same respect that you would a visitor. Make a nice conversation and offer your partner a drink by saying please and thank you. A few niceties and manners will go a long way toward maintaining a mutual respect culture.
3 — Make “we” more than “I”
Couples who use the word “we” when talking are happier, calmer, and in general are more satisfied with their relationships than couples whose communication is more populated by the pronouns “you”, “me” and “I”.
The word “we” changes everything. It activates a connectivity program in the brain, allowing us to shift from a “you vs. me” perspective to a collaborative one. We become more compassionate and generous as a result of this collaborative approach.
4 — Switching roles frequently
A relationship might become stagnant due to boredom and habit. Why not swap it up next week and let her take the wheel instead of hubby? Alternatively, if she is always cooking, suggest a couple of meals provided by him. Switching positions will not only shake things up a little, but it may also make you respect your partner’s point of view. Switching positions in the bedroom is an obvious way to spice up a relationship. Maybe it’s your time if your partner generally initiates sex.
5 — What about exercising together?
Couples who exercise together are not only healthier but also happier in their marriage, according to studies. According to Psychology Today, the symptoms of physiological arousal (the type of high you get from exercise) are similar to the effects of sexual and romantic excitement. You’ll feel attractive and in love if you work out together!
6 — Greet each other when you come home
First and foremost, say “hello.” It may sound cliché, but making sure you greet your spouse when they return home is crucial. It expresses your delight at seeing your lover and frequently translates to “I’ve missed you”.
Let’s face it, it’s discouraging when you come to an event and no one greets you or seems to notice that you’ve arrived. When your spouse returns home, remember to welcome them with a warm “hello” and a nice kiss!
Even a few minutes spent completing some daily activities can make a huge difference in the enjoyment of your relationship. What are daily activities? Everything you do to please your partner and making your partner smile can be a daily activity. It can be either be a hug or kiss on the forehead or etc.
7 — Maintain intimacy
Every relationship requires intimacy, and we’re not just talking about physical intimacy. We’re talking about a genuine emotional bond between you and your companion. Making time for connection is essential whether you’ve been together for a few years or decades. But we understand. It’s not always easy, and getting back on track might be difficult at times. It takes some work to create intimacy, but it doesn’t have to be difficult.
Plan the to-do list and give some effort. It can be achieved.
8 — Date your spouse
Isn’t it true that just because you’re married, you can’t date? You should be dating because you’re married, not because you’re single. It is easy to be caught in the hamster wheel of wake up, grab a cup of the coffee, kiss, run out the door, dinner with the kids, pass out, and repeat. It’s also very easy for your relationship to become exhausted as a result of this.
Each week, set aside one night for you and your partner to spend together, just the two of you. In the summer, go to a nice restaurant, see a movie you both want to see, and get ice cream. There are a plethora of options for a fun, romantic date night that you and your partner both deserve.
9 — “How was your day?”, try this
Something along the lines of “for better or for worse” was undoubtedly written somewhere in your wedding vows. When it comes to your relationship, it’s critical to express the “good and bad” on a daily basis. Make sharing a high point and a low point of each day an enjoyable dinnertime habit. This is something that even the children can participate in! If you want it very personal in between you, make it in your bedroom.
10 — Give your partner space
When two porcupines are trying to stay warm, they will move closer to each other. However, if they get too close, their spines stab one other.
In human relationships, the same thing happens: we seek closeness but yet want space. The idea is to find that sweet spot where we can feel the love that comes with being in a relationship but also giving each partner enough space so that neither of them feels stung by the other’s spines (feelings of lost individuality, feeling crowded, and so on).
11 — Small acts of physical affection can make a big difference.
Marriage does not inevitably imply that there will be no flirtation. It only takes a simple brush of the hands or a kiss as you and your partner walk past each other to keep the spark alive. A healthy relationship built on excellent communication and trust can actually benefit from a little romance and daily physical love. It increases happiness, produces feel-good hormones, lowers blood pressure, helps to relieve stress, and is linked to improved relationship satisfaction.
Kissing, holding hands, hugging, providing a back scratch, or putting a hand around the other person’s shoulder are all examples of physical affection. Also, try to hold hands in public, hug your spouse from behind while they prepare breakfast, and give him or her a love peck on the cheek while they read the newspaper. Regular physical affection, no matter how big or tiny the gesture has a significant impact on a good relationship.
12 — Rituals must
Routines and rituals can aid in the preservation of a relationship. Little things like a goodbye kiss before work, breakfast in bed with a crossword puzzle on weekends, weekly date nights, or a walk after dinner create the glue in a healthy relationship over time. Also, every Saturday night has the potential to be a date night. Another example could be sharing a cup of coffee every morning or spending ten minutes each night before going to bed chatting.
Make at least a meal to be together. Families who dine together are more likely to stay together. The dinner table is a place for spouses and their families to meet and gain physical and spiritual nourishment. Eating nutritious foods as a family at a table not only promotes good nutrition but also creates a regular, holy space for conversation and laughter.
13 — Be willing to adapt to bodily changes.
You and your spouse will evolve and change as you grow older together, and since you have grown so comfortable with each other, you may be eager to point out shortcomings in one other. However, if you want your happy relationship to endure, never bring up the stretch marks, beer belly, or bald area! “You look wonderful (and I love you)” is always the answer to “How do I look?” no matter how old and wrinkled you both get.
14 — Be a supportive pillar in his/her life.
There are a variety of methods to show your support for your partner, including:
- Listen to them when they’re sad and need to express themselves.
- Give praise and compliments.
- Give them any information they might require.
- Give them a helping hand when they require it. For example, when they have to work extra hours, they can complete their housework.
- Work with them to help them achieve their goals. Simply said, treat their aspirations as if they were your own and work hard to achieve them.
- Don’t forget to encourage them in all of their attempts no matter what they are trying. Giving feedback is fine, but never stay apart even if you don’t like what they are trying. Support them and encourage them.
Nothing kills a buzz faster than a negative or non-responsive answer to something you’re passionate about.
15 — Tell your sweetheart why you adore them on a regular basis.
A relationship’s early phases are characterized by butterflies and frequent verbal adoration. The trouble is that as time passes, the butterflies, as well as the “I love you because…” soliloquies, fade away. It’s natural to not be as “lovey-dovey” as you were when you first met, but don’t abandon all verbal affection.
Tell your sweetheart how much you love them on a regular basis, but don’t stop there! Let them know why you adore them. Whether it’s taking the kids to the mall when you clearly need a break, surprising you with flowers one evening, or simply being him/her. Whatever it is, say it proudly and loudly!
16 — Take a moment to look each other in the eyes.
Our parents taught us to look people in the eyes when we spoke to them as children. Eye contact is just as vital in marriage as it was when we were kids, so Mom and Dad may have been onto something! When you’re out with friends or chatting to your kids, having the person you’re talking to check their phone or glance around the room while you’re talking maybe both be disrespectful and annoying. It gives the appearance that the other person is uninterested in what you have to say or simply doesn’t care. When you and your partner are conversing, the same rule applies.
Words are less effective than actions. Instead of saying “I’m listening,” show your partner that you’re paying attention by staring him in the eyes and removing any other distractions while you’re talking.
17 — Say “I love you” with your actions.
Perform small acts of kindness for your lover to show them how much you care. The following are some suggestions:
- On a chilly morning, she needs to warm up her car.
- Deliver takeout from his favorite Chinese restaurant to his house.
- Get up fifteen minutes earlier than she does so that breakfast is ready for her when she enters the kitchen.
- Get him a small surprise gift while you’re out shopping.
Actions should speak more than your words!
18 — Resolve arguments together and fairly before you go to bed
Relationships aren’t destroyed by arguments, but by how you handle them. Disagreements will inevitably arise. The question is, do you go into it with a spirit of looking for resolution, or do you go into it with an attitude of getting even, vengeance, control? If you do that, you’ll never win. If you turn your relationship into a contest, your spouse must lose in order for you to win. It’s not a competition; it’s a collaboration.
“Never go to bed angry”, says an old adage. Is it, however, really the best moment to talk about a problem at half-past midnight? If you have a quarrel late at night, don’t talk about it if you’re both fatigued. Make a plan to talk the next day, say your goodbyes, and sleep on it. In the morning, everything will be a lot clearer.
The following are some of his suggestions on fighting fairly:
- Know what you want to accomplish.
- Set some ground rules for the conversation so you don’t end up arguing about everything that has gone wrong in your relationship.
- Character assassination should be avoided at all costs.
- Active listening should be practiced. Try paraphrasing to make sure you understand what the other person said, and if there’s anything you’re not sure about, ask for clarification.
- Set a time restriction for yourself.
- Be willing to make concessions.
- Come to an agreement on how you’ll address the problem.
Also, never argue about money or assets or properties or vehicles!
19 — Compromises and Adjustments are important
Take the pulse of your relationship every now and again to see what’s working, what isn’t, and what you can do to improve your bond. Do you wish spending time with your family was more important? Do you split up the chores around the house? Discuss the changes that will bring you closer together and agree on the compromises you’re willing to make as a couple.
To avoid disappointments, be flexible with your expectations. Accept yourself, your partner, and your relationship exactly as they are right now. It’s normal to wish for the honeymoon period to endure indefinitely. However, people and relationships evolve with time, with new dynamics and patterns emerging with each new milestone. If both of you are of a different world, don’t try to enter into another’s world. Instead, try to understand that each has a different world and that is not meant for the other. Recognizing their own desires, phases, time, habits and flows will never disappoint the relationship you’re having. So, adjustments are healthy if the bond is worth enough.
Remember, Emperor Akbar and Princess Jodha were able to become the icons of love and their legacy is there till date.
20 — Surprises are not only for birthdays
Who says surprises have to be limited to holidays and birthdays? It’s time to go beyond the traditional birthday cakes and Valentine’s Day greeting cards. We’re talking about unexpected delights! A tiny present or a surprise date merely because “when I saw this, I thought of you”. You could even leave a love note on your partner’s car’s seat one morning or under the morning teacup or even under the plate, even as a note in the bathroom or wherever.
Romance should be a part of your relationship all of the time, not only on special occasions. To keep your relationship exciting, take turns planning dates or other surprises. You could rent kayaks, purchase concert tickets for your spouse’s favorite band, or transform your dining room into a fine dining establishment to wine and dine your partner when you get home from work. Consider what your spouse appreciates while making your plans.
A simple “I love you, have a wonderful day” with a few hearts strewn about could sound a little childish or stupid. But, hey, the romantic gestures and acts of kindness worked at the beginning of the relationship, right? After all these years of marriage, they still work!
21 — Every day, find something to appreciate about your partner.
This is a simple one because it is something that may be expressed or kept private. On a daily basis, try to think of at least one thing you like about your spouse. Even better, tell them! Tell your partner how much you love it if they bring you coffee in bed. Let him know how much you appreciate it when he takes the kids to basketball practice after work.
There is no better type of motivation than having your spouse tell you how much they appreciate the little things you do. And remembering the wonderful things your boyfriend does for you will undoubtedly come in handy when he is grating on your nerves a little more than normal.
What qualities do you admire in your partner? What drew you in the first place? What do you value most about your relationship? To strengthen your connection, focus on the positive aspects.
Don’t forget, two of the keys to mindful loving are acceptance and appreciation.
22 — Spend some quality time.
When it comes to making eye contact, turning off the television or computer every now and then is a terrific approach to give your significant other your undivided focus. There’s no disputing how distracting technology can be, so plan time for you and your partner to disconnect from it. Make a no-cell phone rule for date night, or leave the devices in the other room as you share a cup of coffee together in the morning.
Spending time with your partner without the obtrusive distraction of technology allows you to give each other the care and consideration you both need.
23 — Make a list of goals as a couple.
Be a two-person team working toward a set of mutually agreed-upon goals that are essential to both of you. By working together to develop goals, you’ll be able to accomplish the following:
- You’ll double-check that you’re both heading in the same direction.
- Your victories are their victories.
- You can have a joint celebration whenever you reach a significant milestone.
According to studies, one of the most significant aspects of happiness is working to attain goals that are relevant to you. As a result, having a set of goals that you’re attempting to attain together is one of the components of a good relationship.
24 — Make your partner a priority.
That is, after all, why you are in this relationship.
Making your relationship your first priority does not imply that it is the be-all and end-all. However, it does imply that you make decisions as a pair rather than as individuals. Obviously, this does not apply to every decision you make throughout the day. However, major decisions affecting both of you, such as work, family, or anything else, should be made as a team. This will make both of you feel significant (because you both have a say in the subject) and offer the relationship a much-needed sense of equality.
When you ignore your partner, they are more likely to notice. It makes them feel insignificant, and this might lead to anger. This resentment can lead to arguments and a slew of other issues. Putting yourself in their shoes can be beneficial. What would you think if your lover made you feel insignificant? Especially if you put them at the top of your priority list. Relationships should feel like a team effort, with both parties contributing equally. This is when the issues begin to appear when it feels unequal.
This is especially challenging if you’ve had a string of terrible relationships or have been single for a long time. You don’t want to lose your sense of freedom when you’re used to being on your own. As previously stated, sometimes all it takes is an adjustment of viewpoint. Consider your relationship to be a separate event — it’s just you, your partner, and your relationship. You take care of it, pay attention to it, and give it a prominent position in your life.
Whether you’ve been together for six months or sixteen years, you should constantly put out an effort. It makes all the difference to show your spouse that you want to make them happy (and will go out of your way to do so) and that you care about them beyond all else. It may appear simple, but with our lives busier than ever, we sometimes overlook our relationships. And that’s fine. But, before it’s too late, it’s critical to detect the issue and make the required modifications.
25 — Involve physically as much as possible, DAILY if possible
Having sex every day alleviates the stress that some couples have when it’s time to “perform.” According to reports, having sex every day not only relieved anxiety but also drew him and his wife closer after 14 years of marriage. Furthermore, sex has been shown to lower blood pressure, increase sleep, reduce stress, and potentially prevent prostate cancer. Couples that have sex every day feel that it improves their health as well as their relationship.
Extra tip
You can have a Pet-Name for your partner. Actually, I do have a Pet-Name for my future wife in my mind. Having Pet-Name is cool and it can also show how much you love your partner. There are plenty of Pet-Names or prepare a lovely name as I’ve chosen.
This is how you maintain your relationship joyful and healthy. Following these tips can help you get closer to your partner and improve the quality of your relationship. Contrary to popular assumption, relationships are not as difficult to manage as they are represented. To keep your relationship strong, healthy, and joyful, you just need to instill a few routines and behaviors in your daily life.
Be the best valentine to your partner, because your partner is the one who is going to accompany you till your final days with you!
Hope this helps. Share your thoughts too.
